It’s Main Event time and I arrive for Day 1a to find Aussie pro Julius Coleman to my right, six satellite fish and one empty chair for what most be one of the softest tables in the field. The satellite fish all start off by limpcalling everything or opening to 11x and other retarded spewy play during the first level and I chip up to 28k without finding hands or confrontation with the only major hand occurring when I snap off a retard’s bluff with ace high on a two pair board for about 1k.

By 50/100, i’m sitting on close to 28,000 and it looks like it’s going to be a beautiful day. True to their usual form, PokerNews manages to get about half of the information wrong on this hand so instead of copying their link; this is how it actually went down.

Spewy/bad player who only seems to open limp or raise to 10x or more decides to limp UTG, tilty LAG-fish who has already thrown away 3/4 of his 500bb starting stack putting way too many chips into several different pots with one pair type hands elects to raise to 300. I find 2c 2s on the button and call, UTG calls and we take a three way flop.

Flop: Td 7s 2d

UTG checks, MP bets 500, he’s tilty, shortstacked and has been very aggressive so I elect to call (I normally raise here but villain is likely to have complete air) and UTG minraises to 1000. What? MP calls. Well, one of them probably has some sort of a draw and I can’t let them get there for free. I hate raising here because it looks so much like a set but I kinda have to and they’re both really bad. I make it 3500, UTG quickly calls and MP elects to jam for about 6,900. I ask whether the action is open for UTG and I to raise if we want, the dealer calls the floor and the floor confirms the action is open. I tank for a while, not remotely worried about MP (his range is basically top pair, overpairs and flush draws) but worried about the donktastic UTG player. I figure TT is unlikely since he would have probably raised since he’s made it 10x+ several times already so that leaves his range at something like 77, AT, T7, 8d9d, Adxd with maybe some spazzy random hands in there for good measure like a very badly played aces. I decide to go with the hand and reraise to 18,500 (enough to commit the stacks if UTG has a flush draw) and UTG thinks for a moment and elects to call. I’m a bit worried, but he’s pretty awful and he didn’t jam, so I think i’m good. UTG started the hand with ~27k and we’ve both already put 19k into the pot with about 21k in the Main Pot and 24k in the sidepot, so we’re committed.

Turn: 9d

Oh dear god that is an awful card.

UTG checks. Odd. I move my last 10k in and UTG calls and tables Ts Th (77 wouldn’t surprise me but I didn’t even have TT in his range after his preflop and flop play).

MP tables Ad Qd for the nut flush (which is coincidentally the top of his range too) and I have one out.

River: Qh

I’m crippled to 1400 chips.

I lose my BB, the blinds go up to 100/200 and I lose my SB as well. On the button I find 55 but UTG raises so I elect to fold since i’m massively crushed by his range. On the cutoff, I find A3 and with the BB away from the table, Julius Coleman opens the Hijack to 525. I tell him i’m far enough ahead of his range and jam, it folds back around Julius who calls and tables 9c6c. The board bricks out for both of us and I double to about 3,000.

I find QJ on hijack and minraise the next hand; BTN calls, SB (who has returned to the table) 3bets to 1200. It’s his first 3bet of the tournament. I fold. The hand goes to showdown and SB tables AA (which loses to BTN’s QsTs). Why am I raise/folding a 15bb stack? Sigh. I fold a bit, open shove 2c2s from MP then an orbit later, I find myself involved again with Qs Tc on the BB. Two players limp and I check my option (i’d move in here if there were antes but i’ve moved in a lot and I don’t think I have much fold equity). Flop KQ6 rainbow. With 700 in the pot, the first limper leads 600, the second limper folds. The first limper has only limped with low pocket pairs so far so I decide that with 1300 in the pot and a likely five outs if he wakes up with a hand, there’s not much else I can do with my ~2.5k stack so I move in all but one 25 chip and villain instantly announces call and tables 66. Sigh. The turn is a 7 and i’m drawing dead so I muck for the last 25 (pokernews/pokernetwork has a photo of me with my last 25 chip). So, I now have 1/1000th of a starting stack and 1/8th of 1bb. My K7 triples me up next hand when I bink a king on the river then three players limp a few hands later, I put my last 75 in with A9 and brick out against the limper’s K3 which makes a full house (which he checks twice for some reason before minbetting the river.

Busto~!!!

Well, that sucked. So much for flop set stack donkey. More like flop set against donkey, get set over setted for ~60k (which would have made me chipleader) and go home early.

I’ve now officially dropped half of my bankroll playing live over the past two months. I’m done with live poker for a while and i’m done with playing professionally. My roll is still very grindable for the stakes I play so it’s time to get a full time job and/or go back to uni, drop down in stakes slightly, fire up my computer and go back to what i’m good at; crushing donkeys in 5/10/20 rebuys and 26/55 freezeouts.

GG everyone. Maybe next time.